Life sometimes has a way of making you feel so defeated, but when you sit back and really look at it, the good is always there. Taking a step back and seeing your life or circumstance from a different perspective helps you to understand the truth behind your perceived reality.
If we are truthful with ourselves, we always highlight the negative and don’t give the positive the respect it deserves. How many times have you said, thanks but it was nothing, or brushed off a compliment or praise? We tend to put more emphasis on what happens that causes pain, anguish and trauma than we do when something awesome occurs.
I am getting to the stage where I am understanding that my life really is a product of the things I say and do. I achieve something that I think is amazing and it is ignored, but if I make a mistake then everyone sees it and comments on it. Do I expect more people to see all my negative moments? Do I feel unworthy of the awesome moments of my life?
The way you feel in different situations and how you react brings more and more of that into your life. I expect to have something go wrong when things are going right, and they do. I expect to stay in the background and I do. I expect to fail and I do. When I do succeed I am incapable of accepting the goodness that comes with success.
What am I afraid of? Am I more afraid of failing or succeeding? Is there too much pressure on me to keep succeeding if I do it once? What if I fail after a huge success? Unconsciously we all have these thoughts go through our minds. Some focus on the positive and some on the negative. Our emotions sabotage what we are trying to achieve just to keep us where we expect to be.
I know what I want to do with my life, I know where and how I want to live my life, but deep down inside there is a little voice that keeps telling me I am not good enough. That even if I succeed I will inevitably fail the next time. That tells me, who do you think you are to even contemplate success like that. Then reminds me that I am not like all those successful people. So once again I take a step back and wallow in the self pity that comes forth.
The thoughts I think are stuck in my mind, and they go around and around constantly, but when I write them all down they appear to belong to another person. While I write, I can sort them into categories, into their respective places. Writing them all down helps to shift the focus away from “poor me” to creative ideas on how to deal with and remove them completely from my inner self.
As I write, it is like reading a story, someone else’s story. I am then able to find solutions to the problems. As I write the weight of all these thoughts reduces, and is then replaced with ideas, dreams and goals. It doesn’t seem as hard as it does when I just think the thoughts.
When you are down, just a little sad or completely beside yourself with worry and anxiety, get out a pen and some paper. It doesn’t have to be fancy. You just need something to write with, and something to write on. The important part is getting it out of your mind and onto the paper. No one has to see it or read it, you don’t have to keep it. The act of releasing it from your inner thoughts to paper, helps you to focus on the thoughts rather than the emotions behind the thoughts.
Try it for yourself when you feel a little sad, and see how much your emotions shift. The old adage, better out than in, certainly applies to your thoughts. The more you shift within, the more the outer world falls into line with how you really want to be.