Over my years on Facebook I have met a lot of wonderful people. A lot have come into my life and a lot have left. At first I got upset when I felt I had been abandoned, but now I have come to understand the difference in being rejected and just moving on.
People come into your life for various reasons, some for a short time, some forever. That’s the way life goes. You learn a lesson or two and move onto the next part of your life story.
I have learned a lot about myself over the last year or two. Dealing with financial issues, health issues and general upheaval that goes on in everyone’s life. Most people take you at face value, what they see is what they assume, but we are much deeper than that and most people don’t see the truth of the person beyond their physical being.
I know I look fine, overweight yes but nothing physical stands out, yet beneath the surface an insidious disease is eating away at my joints and my bones. The damage may not be seen outwardly for years, yet I feel every excruciating pain of each joint. The treatment itself causes even more damage to other parts of my body that are not connected with the disease itself. Yet for now I have no choice in how I treat this.
The same thing occurs with friendships, romances and relationships of all kinds. What you see in front of you does not always show the truth beneath. People keep their deepest emotions to themselves and rarely do we get a glimpse of just how they feel or what they think.
To outsiders things may look wonderful but deep inside something that starts off small and insignificant grows and grows until everything falls apart and shocks everyone with what they think is the speed of it all. Unless you allow those small seeds of discomfort an escape then it will build and build until they have no other recourse than an emotional explosion.
I have taken a step back and watched myself do this very thing. I have always taken everything that happens around me very personally, but these last 12 months I have been able to almost step outside my body and watch my actions and reactions.
The way I judge myself and others has been a standout lately. The times I have taken, so very personally, something that had nothing to do with me has opened my eyes to the way my personality operates.
It causes upset, disappointment, anger and even fear. All contributing to even more health problems, when really I should just back away. Do what I need to do, mind my own business and let it all work out accordingly.
The same with my journey through Facebook. As people grow and expand their dreams, desire and objectives change. They become different to what you yourself are trying to achieve. The more people around me that changed and moved on the more I thought there was something wrong with me. Now I know and understand that it is all just progression. We all expand and develop at different paces, depending upon our goals.
With some I am left behind, with others I move quickly forward. It does not mean that these relationships have to end, but they do change. This I am discovering is a good thing. In order to develop we need to have new options, new quests and a new way of relating.
Take a step back, look at how you respond or react to what others around you are doing. Look at your emotional responses and choose what is right for you in this moment. If others move on from you then that leaves a space for someone new to arrive. Someone who might have the experience or the actions that help you move into the next part of your life.
Be happy for the relationships that come and go. Be grateful for the illness that forces you to re evaluate. Remember the experiences that brought joy into your life and those that caused pain and most of all celebrate that you had that experience in the first place. For without it you would not be who you are today. There is always something deeper than what appears to be, there is always purpose, there is always growth.
Not everyone has an ulterior motive, not everyone hates you or likes you, but everyone and everything that comes your way has a purpose. It is up to you to understand that purpose, deal with it and use it to become more of who you really are.
My illness and the people who have joined me on my journey all have shown me the way. It is now up to me to understand it, deal with it and follow it up with decisive action, in order to grow. Can you see the same for your life?