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Remembering The Plan

It has once again been quite a while since I sat to write. No excuses this time. I just haven’t felt the need to express my feelings to the world. It is after 7pm where I am now, and not usually a time I would focus on writing, but things can change in a moment.

I found some of my writings from the past year or two and decided to read through them. Just to see what has changed in the physical and the mind. I came across a question I had asked of my spiritual team. As I read the page, my emotions welled up and began to overflow. Things have a way of arriving just when you need them, and today is one of those days.

I would like to share the question and answer that came through and hope that it, in some way, helps those that need it at this moment in time.

What to do?

“Be guided by the darkness that surrounds you, allow it to run its course and be released. This darkness is a necessary step for you. When you work through what the darkness gives you, then you will emerge into the light. This is a time of enormous change for you, but you already know this. Why do you resist the changes?

You understand that they are required and you understand that it must be so in order for you to grow. Fighting against the lesson only serves to slow things down and there your frustration begins to grow. If you relax and allow then the frustration will lift, as will the darkness. You know this to be so, so do not resist.

Look deep within the darkness that surrounds you, for within it are the answers to your new beginning. This has been planned by you for this moment in your time, from before your conception and birth into this incarnation. You are now at the point of this life where things become much more meaningful and deeper for you.

Your purpose, your entire reason for being is now underway and yet you still resist. The pain of this transformation is intense, we understand this, but you are strong enough to succeed. You asked for it to be this way, as it is the only way you understood your human existence, could and would, know it for what it is.

Step aside from the human standpoint for just one moment and know this to be true. You are meant to be where you are. We understand that it is unpleasant to your human self, but your spiritual self looks forward to the challenge and the growth that will occur. From this perspective, this is one of many lessons you have chosen for this lifetime and you have succeeded in all the rest, have you not?

Why should this experience be any different? What you learn from this experience, as an experience is all that it is, will help your human side to deal with things much more easily. Each time you come to a crossroads and a turning point, a new road, a change in dimension and level of planetary change you shall resist less. Be aware that although there is pain and anger and frustration that these are human emotions and not worthy of elongating the experience.

The more you understand this the more you can trust that your spiritual core knows what is happening and it is doing, and understand completely that this is important at this time. Understand that this is so necessary now, be grateful for this experience of the darkness, as once your emerge into the light, the darkness shall vanish forever.

This is your final hurdle to the experience of true light living. Once you are there, your human side will wonder why you worried so. All falls into place in a perfect scenario of steps and movement. Be still and listen to what is inside you, your core central truth of who you are, knows this truth and it is time for you to release it into your physical surroundings.

Your purpose is to shine the light on the darkness. This is a beautiful and cleansing experience. Your presence is till required on this plane, there is no other choice than to be who and what you are. You stifle and block from fear of your power. We ask that you unleash your powerful true being and shine the light upon the darkness of this world, for it is sorely needed.

This moment in your incarnation is important in many ways for you, and for those around you and indeed for the world in which you are physical. Many are following your journey, some ahead, some behind and all guide each other along the way.

We are here to assist you as you ask, we are to guide as needed, we are here to just be within your essence. To bask in the journey that you so bravely have undertaken. Be strong, be brave, be whole and be heartened by the fact that your journey through treacherous waters is nearing it’s end. You will emerge, dear one, into the light of knowledge and joy. Safe in the knowing that all is worth the effort and what you have learned you are to share and to guide others who so fear the darkness.

Your journey has been hard, this we acknowledge, but again you knew from the beginning that it would not be easy and that is why you chose this body and this lifetime.

Remember you are loved immensely and we are always here behind you, in front of you and beside you. Protecting and shielding and guiding. Remember you are love and as such a most spectacular and beautiful part of the essence of soul.”

It seems I once again forgot my journey and allowed the fear to overtake it. Rereading these words has spurred me to once again take steps to live my purpose. I hope it moves you enough to do the same.

Margaret ❤

 

 

 

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Lessons On The Path

Another day another doctors appointment. This being ill is exhausting work. So much easier to be healthy and fit. Between doctor’s appointments, chemist visits, and reading up on the new drug they want me to take, I feel like I have run a marathon.

It’s so very easy to take your health for granted. When you are ill it seems like a never ending road. My rheumatoid arthritis is not improving as I had hoped, my medication is not reducing the inflammation as it should. So, now onto a new drug, another one that is supposed to reduce inflammation and lessen the possibility of damage.

I am developing a powerful dislike to the chemicals that they wish to bombard my body with. I started with one problem and the medication for it causes other problems which then need another medication to counteract that problem. It feels like a never ending cycle of more and more drugs.

This new medication is for at least the next two months, at which time the specialist would like to put me onto a biological medication. The thought of this scares the life out of me. In order to have this medication I now need to have a vaccine for shingles, because this new biological drug can cause chicken pox!!

It seems pointless to keep giving drugs that cause other major problems and then have to take yet another to fix it. I already take two different types of medication and the third starts in the morning. Unless I can get this disease under some sort of control, then the fourth will become needed in a few months time.

I feel like I am going around in circles. Any wonder I have always stayed away from doctors unless it was absolutely necessary. I am having doubts that all this is the way I should be handling this disease. Yes, without the medication I cannot move but there must be a better way.

My new goal now is to make sure that I do not need the biological drug and to find a more natural way to deal with the damage being done to my body. I know my body is capable of repairing itself, I have faith that the natural way is the best and most effective. Yet still I hesitate and procrastinate. The drugs I currently take are stopping my body’s natural repair functions from activating.

There are also other considerations, financial and well as emotional to take into consideration. Yes it is easier to take the medication and just get on with life, but even this is affected by my emotional and mental state. Do I take what I am told to take and cover up the real enemy destroying my body, or do I dig deeper and discover the answers that are just below the surface.

I have spent years reading spiritual literature, trying different things to see what fits and what doesn’t. I know the answers are inside me, I know I need to find them and deal with them. I know what I have to do, yet I sit and wait for someone to come and do it for me. Procrastination and fear have kept me from following any and all of my dreams.

Now this disease is here to shake me up and get me to do what I have waited to do for my entire life. Will I wait longer or will I take up the challenge and do what needs to be done? I always remember my paternal grandmother having this disease. I never understood it, I was too young to know how she really felt. All I remember is not wanting to end up just like her, and guess what, here I am all these years later, just like her.

I have the advantage of knowing that I did indeed draw it to myself in my efforts to push it away. I have a much more sympathetic understanding of this woman who seemed distant to her own children and grandchildren. The pain that she must have felt, mirrors my own. Whether or not she let others know how she felt, I do not know but I have tried to keep it more to myself rather than explain it all.

While I am surrounded by those with a little pain that they turn into something huge, I have sat back and let them say, you only have a bit of arthritis, nothing like what I have. If only they understood what this disease is and what it does and how it affects the body, then maybe I would be more open about it.

For now I have my goals, reaching them is something that I will have to focus on with a strength that I have not yet found. Pushing myself to be more than I have ever been and to take the chances that appear no matter how fearful I become is something that I need to find. I know it is there I just need to reach in and dig it out.

My procrastination is so deeply entrenched that I face a huge battle, but my independence, my mental state, my emotions and indeed my entire life, rest upon this journey. To become all I can be and to overcome the blockages that I myself have put before me is the ultimate goal. Health, wealth and happiness will then be the byproduct.

Don’t let things get you down, don’t allow the negativity to take a foothold. Don’t allow yourself to get to the point where you regret not doing anything earlier. Sweep it all away with love, joy and a happy heart and soul. I know I can do it, and I know you can too.

Margaret ❤

 

 

 

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Living The Lessons

The days seem to be flying at the moment. Almost half way through the year and the more I think about it, the more I feel that I have wasted so much time. The plans that were made at the end of the previous year all fell by the wayside quite quickly.

I had so many dreams and goals for this year. Especially after the year from hell that was 2016. Yet 2017 which promised a new beginning and a fresh new start, continued the same energy of last year. The more I tried to plan the more things went down hill.

Before you know it, the year is half way through and nothing has been achieved. I feel as if I have spent an enormous amount of time doing nothing and then feeling regret for letting this time slip away. Now is the time for me, and anyone else feeling the same way, to make a concerted effort to spend the rest of this year fully engaged in living in a more authentic way.

I find for myself if I decide that I am going to do something that I need to do it immediately. Otherwise it ends up being put on the back burner, along with so many other thoughts, dreams and goals. I am a list maker. I find myself lost for hours when I write lists of what to do, where to go, what to buy.

I recently cleaned out a chest in my room that was full of lined exercise books. These books were filled with list after list of my hopes and dreams, none of which came to fruition. All left to gather dust in a dark place. My habits seem to push me into this dark place where I am allowed to dream but not allowed to bring these dreams to life.

So how do you change the habits that have been with you for a lifetime? No matter what you read or who you ask, it is not a simple thing to release these habits and change your life in a quick and easy way. It takes discipline to change a habit. It takes repetition to change a habit.

After everything that has happened in the last two years, I now have an opportunity to make these changes. Knowing where to start is a problem though. I am so stuck in my ways that even now that I no longer can work, I still wake at the same time of the morning, I still shower as if I am preparing to go to work. Then I find myself sitting at the computer and getting lost in whatever I decide to look at.

Before I know it, time has slipped by and it is dinner time, and another day has been wasted. The first thing I need to do is to understand that I am not and have not wasted this time. I have spent so much of the last two years in pain that my body requires this slowing down. I need to adapt to how my life will be from this moment on. I can no longer do what I have always done.

The physical limitations have sapped my energy and the resulting frustration makes me give up at times. Now though as I find different ways to do the things I need and want to do, I tend to push myself a bit more. There is always a way to do something and if there is a way I will find it. I refuse to live the rest of my life missing out on the things I have always loved to do and the things that that I have always wanted to do.

If anything, this disease has taught me to find a new way of living, a way that very clearly I needed to understand. I fought against this for so long, but now as I make the changes needed in order to live, I have come to understand that all is not lost. I can still have the life I have always wanted, I just need to go about it in a different way.

This has been a huge lesson for me. From the pain to the financial problems to the everyday physical limitations, all this has taught me that there is a way and there always will be a way. You just have to find what suits you and how you can arrange things so you don’t feel like you are missing out on something.

As my life falls into place in a new way I look forward to the new opportunities that this disease will bring to me. It has served to push me out of my comfort zone and out of my habitual brain dead life. My hope is that the rest of this life is spent discovering new ways of being and new things to learn.

My time of giving up is over and now as I work towards making the changes that are so overdue in my life, I intend to take each step slowly and with the knowledge that I am giving myself the absolute best chance of a beautiful life.

I wish you all good living, good learning and good loving. Take a chance, make a change and look forward, no matter what, to the rest of your incredible life.

Margaret ❤

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Feeling The Feelings

Today is the end of the third week of my treatment for rheumatoid arthritis. The new weekly tablet seems not to be working yet, but I was told that it would take at least four weeks. So I am very grateful that I am still taking steroids for the moment. Yesterday I almost forgot to take the steroid tablets, that’s how good I felt. Today I am a little sore. More than likely tried to do a little too much yesterday.

I also went to bed the night before, the night of the full moon, with the intention of feeling better and improving my health. It seems to have worked. I asked for myself to be cleared of negative energy and then went to sleep. I do feel somewhat more positive than I have for a while. Although the tablets are keeping some of the pain at bay for now, I still feel that I have turned a corner.

Intention has always been the most important part of any type of manifestation. Without it you are doomed to failure. If you cannot get your mind and heart into the right space, then no amount of wishing and hoping will bring you what you desire. Keeping your energy in the right frequency is at times, more difficult than it seems.

It can only take one small problem to have everything fall down around you. In order to keep my energy at a higher level than it has been for quite some time, I spent some time listening to some chakra clearing meditations and music in various frequencies. The frequencies I chose were 417 Hz to clear the negative energy of my space, followed by 528Hz to raise the vibration and create a more relaxed feeling in my home.

It is only when I make the effort to listen to music that I remember how it makes me feel and what it does to my body and my space. I tend to not find the time to do many things that are good for me and listening to music always has an amazing affect on me. I must make more of an effort to do the things that make me happy.

When you are happy things fall more easily into place. So the more you can do to keep that feeling, the happier you will be and the better your life will become. We all have off days, those times where things seem to fall apart but if you keep your focus on how you want to feel rather than how you are feeling, then your vibration  will elevate and make the space around you softer and more gentle.

Always remember that you are in control of how you feel. There is no one that can make you feel anything unless you allow it. When we are down and things fall apart, it is because we have allowed our energy to drop and let those around us have more control of our feelings. Take back control of your life. Let your feelings become the focus of your life.

Use the tools around you, such as music, poetry, and meditation to keep you at a place you want to be. Do not deny yourself the small pleasures in life. These are the things that make your life special. You may not have millions of dollars to spend on achieving your every dream, but the things you can do to make your space happier do not need to cost the earth to achieve.

Don’t put off until you have the money. Don’t put off until you are in the mood. Don’t put off until someone gives you permission. Do it now. Allow it now in your life, and most of all feel it now.

Margaret ❤

 

 

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Moving Into Power

Well the time has come my friends for action. No longer can we sit and wait for life to come to us. Now we must move forward and take part in the life that we so often dream about, yet rarely do anything to achieve.

What action must we take? One step, one movement, one little thought that urges us to make a move in the right direction is all it takes. Once you make that small adjustment, then life falls into place quite easily. The only problem then is allowing our egos to take control and try to force things in a certain way.

What occurs then is blockages, lots of blockages. Then the life we are aiming for gets pushed further and further away, and we ask ourselves what are we doing wrong? The more we allow our ego to control the more we push it all so far away that we end up further away than we were in the first place.

So now we have to deal with the ego issues as well as try and get back on track and heading for our dream life again. You can see why so many give up. To make all that effort to end up back where we were and having to start again can be a hard thing to understand, even for those who are strong enough and those who actually understand what they are doing. Yet we seem powerless to do anything about it.

The old saying two steps forward and one back becomes one step forward and two back, and over time we gradually lose the excitement and the focus and then give up. Making the excuse that it wasn’t what we really wanted, it wasn’t what Source or God or the Universe had in store for us.

I am calling bullshit! For too long have I and others lived this way, for too long have we allowed our power to be stripped from us, for too long have we sat back and just accepted. No more, this has to stop. We are powerful beings, we came here with a plan. Some live their plan easily, some get so totally engrossed in the physicality of human life that they forget and end up living the monotonous daily grind, asleep in the worst of ways and yet not able to drag themselves from the slumber.

Then there are those of us who know we are here for a reason. Again two groups of beings, those who know yet cannot do and be and those that know and do and become all that they have always known they were capable of. Which group do you fall into? Are you asleep? Are you awakening to the magnificence of this incarnation? Are you itching to do what you know in your heart is just out of reach?

How much do you want to change your life? How much do you want to allow your power to rise and become the catalyst for something wonderful, something honest and true? Something that will change the very fabric of your being. How much do you want to be you?

There is a way, there is always a way. It takes courage to tread upon this path and allow yourself to become all you have always been. Too many of us feel fear when we think of our own personal power. What if we are successful, what if we are capable, what if we are the ones we have looked outside for? You have all you need, you always have.

You do not need anything else, in fact to achieve all you wish to achieve you must give things up. Fear, terror, shame, insecurity, feelings of unworthiness, all these must be discarded. To step into wholeness you must leave behind the negative thoughts and ideas. To step into your power you must accept that you have that power.

To see yourself as anything less than perfection is doing yourself an injustice. Who you are comes from within, to become who you are you must release all ideas of who and what you are that do not come from you. Those who speak ill of you, those who are jealous of what you do and say and are, speak from fear. They are not ready to believe that they too are a powerful eternal spiritual being. They stay small in their own negative beliefs and reflect these thoughts and ideas onto the people that scare them. They fear the power that lies within them.

Personal power is not something to be afraid of, it is a beautiful experience of who you truly are and now it is up to you to allow that person the freedom to be. Release your fear. Stand up now for it is time for humanity to take another step forward. We have lived small for far too many generations, the energy is changing. What before seemed to be an ego expression has now become the truth of who we really are.

Let the fear go, move into your power and begin to live the life that you, and all around you have dared to dream of for so long.

Margaret ❤

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Breaking Through The Blockages

Three weeks into the new year and I find myself procrastinating again. I feel as if I am on the verge on a breakthrough, yet something is holding me back. I have plans, I have thoughts and ideas in my mind and in my heart but still it does not seem the right thing to do.

I am perplexed at the way my mind is working at this moment. I know what I need to do, I have it all ready to work on. The blockage that I am faced with at this moment seems larger than it should. Now whether this blockage is just me being me or whether there is something else on the horizon is the number one question.

I know what I am like. I see how I work, I completely understand how I work, but yet, I do not feel totally comfortable with my plans. Old beliefs and barriers keep reappearing, making it all the more harder to make decisions.

The main obstacle in my thinking is about abundance. I come from a family where my parents worked hard to get what they wanted. I never went without while I was a child. It has only been as I have grown older than things turned pear shaped. Do I expect too much? Do I expect too little?

Are my plans something that will come so easily that I do not feel worthy of it? Do I still, although I have tried not too, believe that only from working my butt off will I ever amount to anything. Why am I so scared of being successful, of having the home I want, of having money to buy and do whatever I want? Why do I feel that getting things easily is cheating? Is playing the victim and the oh poor me card so much more desirable?

One way or another I am going to have to find something that just tips the edge my way. Something that shows me without doubt that I am worthy of the life I wish to live. Something that shows me that my dreams are not all fantasy. My one step forward seems to have landed in a block of concrete from which I can not move.

Old patterns of behaviour, old memories, old failures all come flooding back when I think I am ready to move on. Pushing them back down inside has become such a chore and not an efficient one at that. If anything, this year has shown me that it is different and so I must face these tests with a new thought process.

The comfort zone has become somewhat of a prison, and one from which I must find an escape route. The old ways no longer work, they keep the walls firmly in place and stronger than ever. Now is the time to make the changes that I have needed and asked for, for so long.

I have proved over and over that the law of attraction works. Whatever I have asked for I have always received. It is time to make those requests more positive. To ask for what I want instead of mulling over past hurts and injustices. To focus on the life I want not the life I wish to run away from. Practice they say, makes perfect, and so with that in mind spending more time living in the now, living as if, and planning for the inevitable changes must become a priority.

My procrastination in the past has led to the universe forcing the much needed changes upon me. Not always in the way that has led to improvement and growth. Now I must push for those changes myself. Not totally in control of them, yet steering the ship more evenly than before.

Another step forward, although not in a physical sense but more in a mind set way has to be an improvement from standing still. And so, onwards again, I move that little bit closer to where I aim to be. As my mind and heart adjusts to the thoughts of being worthy and valuable, so my life moves in that direction. I have complete faith that this time the changes will make a difference.

And that faith, for me, is one giant leap forward.

Margaret ❤

 

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A New Day Has Dawned

Memories and ponderings flash through my mind, hoping and wishing for a new life divine.

Allowing the sadness its time in the light, letting it go and making it right.

Feeling so low and down on my luck, trying to fight and get out of the muck.

Digging so deeply down deep within, hoping and praying something begins.

Strength and power I have on my side, time to buckle up and go along with the ride.

Action and intent flow through my mind, leaving all the badness way back behind.

A new life’s begun one foot through the door, gather up courage and take one more.

Once on my way a pattern is formed, taking more steps a new day has dawned.

Margaret ❤

 

 

 

 

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